As Above So Below

 Hey everyone who enjoys movies and blogs, I'm TheCinemaChick! I go out and watch a lot of movies then report back to you so you know what's worth seeing out there. Sadly, there hasn't really been anything that's caught my eye as of late. Everything just seems...okay. Not good, not bad, just somewhere in the middle. But, as you all know, I do love a good horror movie. So when I heard “As Above, So Below” was coming out, I had to see it. Last night, Fry and I watched the movie and that means I'm here to review it with minimal spoilers.

I'm also still behind on my reviews, so I'll probably do another blog with a bunch of mini reviews again. I don't like doing them but I have a lot going on and I just don't think I have the time to devote to each and every one. It pains me to sum up my feelings for a movie in a single paragraph. But in the interest of time, sometimes it is a necessary evil.

Now, “As Above, So Below” is a supernatural horror that takes place in the Paris catacombs. I'm both horrified and fascinated by them because they are basically a labyrinth under the city made up of human bones. Due to my overwhelming claustrophobia, I will never step foot in there. As you can see in the previews, a group of people are looking for the fabled Philosopher’s Stone, which would grant eternal life. They get lost and scary things happen as they continue on their journey, but is it as terrifying as the commercials would have you believe?

As with most movies that are classified in the horror genre, no. It is another “found footage” film that has a few jump scares but never truly delivers on it's promise to make you jump out of your seat. I'll admit, there was one time I did get startled but I'm chalking that up to “I'm weaning off an anti anxiety medicine so I'm already jumpy as is”. Really, it was just “Paranormal Activity” set in Paris. There are things brought in that are never mentioned later or potential side stories that pop up and vanish almost instantly.

And that bothered me more than it should really. As in the previews, you see a burning car that one person apologizes to. The film never truly explains its purpose. I watched the scene thinking this has to be a moment when a character must redeem himself in order to go on but when he tried to do so, he was killed. However, later in the story, someone does the exact same thing and it works. So why was Scarlet, our determined urban archeologist, allowed to live after redemption but Papillon, the French tour guide, was not? Is there some kind of double standard that I'm not seeing? Perhaps I am over thinking this but most of the deaths in the movie were not needed or really explained. One man falls to his death and it's never shown what caused this fall. Again, why are the men being killed off but not Scarlet? There is one French companion, Susie, who is gruesomely bludgeoned to death but her death is understandable within the context.

There is a scene in the movie where Scarlet keeps assuring George her...love interest...I think, that they are just experience illusions because of the catacombs. I cannot accept this because if it were an illusion as she claimed, then no one should have died. They would not be real, therefore not corporeal and not able to touch someone. Yet all but three die. How does this make sense? I find it hard to take a horror movie seriously if it can't even decide what its doing. There are glaring plot holes and mistakes throughout, this being one of them.

However, I will praise the movie on its scenery. The catacombs defintely come across creepy and sent some chills down my spine. The movie also does a good job keeping the film very tight and focused on the travelers and not much else. There aren't a lot of distractions which helps a little, but can't save this film overall. The characters themselves are flat and one dimensional. There is not change in them, no growth. I found it hard to sympathize with any of them because I didn't get a chance to like them.

I have made one interesting discovery. “As Above So Below” was directed by John Erick Dowdle, the same man who made “Devil” back in 2010. I have noticed that both movies play on ideology, mainly with the ideas of Christianity and sins. While I prefer to refrain from religious discussion because not everyone shares the same beliefs, I will also applaud him on the use of said themes. Both make you question whether or not the devil is real. While the earlier film was set almost entirely in an elevator, it still created an air of paranoia, mistrust and fear. The new release does the same thing just in a new location. If this is Dowdle's style, the close, tight, almost claustrophobic feeling running throughout, I would watch more of his films. I like his style as it is unique. I would advise him to pick better scripts, do more research on his topic and hire better script writers.

It's a subpar movie that might scare some people, but it just left me wondering why they didn't bother to fix the plot holes. I won't mention them because of spoilers, but they are incredibly obvious. The end of the film had me asking if Hell was in Paris or if they were implying that Paris itself is Hell. Toying with the concept of reality worked in the movies favor, but the lack of continuity ruins it. I found it hard to get invested and wound up enjoying my nachos more. Seriously, I could go on about those nachos for a while.

I would like to see more from John Erick Dowdle in the future. I like his style and with some fine tuning, he could be simply amazing. I expect “As Above So Below” to do well this weekend but once word gets out that it's not all it seems, it will quickly fall.

In general, I'd say skip this one. Go see something else. It's not scary and spends too much time trying to force the jump scares on you which just makes it feel...well...forced. I still think “The Conjuring” is a superior horror film and I have recently acquired a collection of fifty horror classics starring people like Bela Lugosi and Vincent Price. Who wants to guess how I am spending my weekend? If you guessed shopping with Fry, you're either spying on me, have been listening to my calls or you just know.

That's about it for me on this go round. “As Above So Below” isn't worth the time or money. It's another “Blair Witch” and “Paranormal Activity” wannabe.

I'm TheCinemaChick and I have just received word that I am going to be published for a second time. That's right, my short nonfiction story “A Flurry of Hands” will be published in “Under the Clock Tower” later this year.

Thank you guys for all the love, support and pageviews. It means the world to me knowing that people enjoy my often nonsensical reviews.

Trailer Trash: Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones

 What is up everyone? It's almost time for Christmas so here is my early gift to you. I'm TheCinemaChick, joining forces once again with the ever bubbly Kit Kat. We're back for another installment of Trailer Trash, where we look at a trailer for an upcoming film and just go “What the hell is this?” Tonight's pick is a good one. As we all know, January isn't exactly the best month for horror movies. The last one “The Devil Inside” was such a disappointment, it's been dubbed one of the worst films of all time because the ending was like a giant middle finger to the entire audience. So, does “Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones” stand a better chance? Well, let's look at the trailer and see what's scary as hell and what makes us groan. Kit Kat, say hello since it's been too long since your last visit.


Hello all you movie lovers and haters. I’m Kit Kat and I’m back for another lovely round of Trailer Trash. While I haven’t personally seen all of the other Paranormal Activity Movies, just seeing the trailers didn’t get my hopes up for a decent movie. And here we are again with their FIFTH installment… Besides the Fast and Furious franchise…I don’t remember another series with five movies.


Other than Harry Potter, Indian Jones I think, James Bond...nope. The thing is, the whole “found footage” genre has been slowly dying for years but for some reason, this franchise will not die. I wouldn't be surprised if we saw a sixth or seventh installment from them. Here's my main issue with the films. We know it started with Katie and Kristie. With each film, we have gotten father and farther away from them. In this trailer, they are briefly mention and one of them is a stepmother. I'm guessing this means the daughter from the second film finally returns since she apparently wasn't home when her parents were killed and her brother taken. I'm not sure how I even remember that off the top of my head.


Yes, those are the others. Indiana Jones being the least successful of the most successful I do believe. But the fact that they are still trying to make a good horror movie for this franchise is a little…disturbing. Many by now would have gotten the point and stopped the insanity. From an outside point of view, the movies all seem to blur together because they all look similar.


My main issue is, how are these all connected and will there ever be an end? I just don't understand how this demon can affect so many people when the main characters are not even present anymore. Ok, yes Katie was in the fourth one briefly but that's not much. There's also too many characters overall. Most of them are totally irrelevant to the plot anyway. So now we're apparently in the south side of Los Angeles, with some Hispanic kids. I have no freaking clue what this has to do with anything I have seen before and I've seen all the films to date.


And I’ll say what I thought after first seeing this trailer: is this a horror movie or a live action Grand Theft Auto? I mean really. The music, the visuals. I couldn’t help but to think that they are trying to do way to much on the establishing of our location. Sure, it’s LA but we know it’s a horror movie franchise. That’s the point of going to see this movie. Not for feeling like we are LA. Sure we need to feel for the characters but I don’t know how well I’d feel for some guy who seems to party all the time and that he thinks a baseball bat will protect him from gangs.


What bothers me is that I know this will follow the formula of its predecessors, nothing for the first 3 acts, then all the action and horror will take place in the final act, followed by some title cards telling us this is still being investigated or something. The whole series is getting a bit stale, so honestly, they need to liven things up a bit. Do something different. Build suspense, stop relying on so many jump scares and for the love of Matthew Gray Gubler, give us an ending to the story, not a continuation! Seriously, I want to know how this thing ends. What's with the demon and what's going on with the sudden shift in location? There is no sense in continuity here. The films are all highly disjointed but at least the first three sort of worked as a trio. Everything else is just confusing and unneeded.


*stares off into the distance* ah…Matthew. *ahem* And I completely agree. If you are going to do a shift in location then you need you let the audience know why but not at the expense of the current movie. I fear the same that this movie is going to try and establish itself in the timeline and then half way through you will finally get the new movie with them prodding you to keep you realizing it’s connection to the others. Movies like that never work because they are trying way too hard and that’s what’s happening here. By now they are either desperate or hoping fifth time is a charm to make some money. I’m sure some people will go to see it for mindless entertainment but maybe this time someone will get the hint to rethink doing another one.


To be fair, we are basing everything we are saying solely on what we've seen from the trailer. I admit, the creepy factor is indeed there. There are several things that I find unsettling and downright disturbing. There are a few things where I just go “What??” or “I don't want to know...but now I need to know.” This does seem to have other horror elements worked in besides demonic possession. I did notice the religious aspect being introduced, so here's hoping they don't offend the entire Catholic church with this. Then there's a scene with the two creepy girls saying “He'll see you now”. What the actual hell?


I agree there are some creepy aspects to the trailer. The parts that get me are when he is standing looking in the mirror and pulling the string or whatever out of his eye. *shudders* Get’s my skin crawling. But the jump scare of seeing the guy down the road and the kids not being able to get out of the car. He disappears and suddenly he’s in the window and breaks through the window. Those moments get my adrenaline going like a horror movie should. If they do work those horror aspects in well with the rest of the movie then maybe it might not be as bad as we think it will. Besides, it’s all ready been proven that two creepy girls talking together are creepy.


I have a little big of hope that this one might be an improvement over the previous four. It seems to be going in a different direction and hopefully it won't be the formulaic mess it has been. There seems to be some new things introduced so its possible that it won't completely suck. We can only hope that this is true. Knowing my luck, I'll be dragged to see it. If I'm lucky, I'll get stuck next to a cute guy so when I get “scared” I can grab him. *crosses fingers* Please let it be Tom Hiddleston.


Well, I’m broke and don’t have the money to see this one. Besides, I’m saving my money to see Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug. I like me some hot dwarves and elves over possibly bad horror movies anyday.


Yeah, you say that but wait until you see Smaug. That is one sexy dragon, mainly because he has the voice of Benedict Cumberbatch. That's all I really have to say about the new Paranormal Activity film coming out in January. I hope this is the final installment honestly. I'm looking forward to 2014 and the hundreds of new films coming out, waiting for me to critique.


And with any luck, we might have another bad movie to review for Bad Movie Bonanza. Knowing movies as we have, there will always be another bad movie to rant about. Oh the fond memories. And that’s all I have to say about the movie either. No high hopes but maybe some very small ones.


Well Kit Kat, I believe it's time to sign off. Here's to the holidays, the New Year and to the movies that will be released, both good and bad. Anything to add?

Just that I hope to get back to my reviewing of books very soon. The holidays are always hectic but I hope to get at least one review done before the year is out and maybe even a video for my video roulette. Only time will tell. Anyway, I’m Kit Kat and I love me some trailer trash.

I'm TheCinemaChick, wishing everyone a happy and safe holiday.  My Best of 2013 list is coming, so stay tuned.

Beware The Woman in Black

            Greetings all you movie going, blog reading people out there!  I’m known as TheCinemaChick and welcome to my first and only review of February.  As I mentioned in my last blog, I’m a little burned out.  I had 16 entries in the previous month, so my brain, my fingers and my wallet need a break.  I did, however, mention that no matter what I would review “The Woman in Black”, the brand new Daniel Radcliffe thriller.  

            Right now, all I can say is “Holy cow…that was amazing.”

            Now, I’ve become rather wary of scary movies.  Please ignore the unintended rhyme there.  The last few movies that were supposed to frightening…well…failed miserably.  “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark” was more of a fantasy and “The Devil Inside” was just an abomination.  Even the movies I rented didn’t phase me.  I mean, I liked “Insidious” but overall, it just did nothing.  So, as with any new release, I was hesitant when I heard preliminary reviews for this.  People were saying that it was indeed frightening, but then again, this is me.  I don’t scare easily, if at all.

            This is the only time I will admit this but, I was hiding behind my jacket during portions of the film.  I gasped, I was on the edge of my seat and yes, I was scared.  The opening scene alone had me freaked out.  While I normally can’t show you clips of the film, Yahoo! Movies actually has this posted online.  So, feel free to watch the opening scene and trust me, it hooks you in immediately.

            If you’re not interested after seeing that, well, then don’t see it.  What got me was the use of the slightly creepy music with those freaky old dolls.  But when you get to the part where the girls stop playing, crush their toys and jump out the window, you have to admit, that is terrifying.  While it seems strange and somewhat random now, trust me, it all makes sense in the end.

            Like I said, I’m normally not scared when I see a movie, but this one had so many moments that made me grip the arm rests of my seat.  There are a few obligatory jump scares, but the rest just keeps building the suspense higher and higher until you reach the unexpected climax and subsequent ending.  I honestly did not see that final twist heading my way, which is rare.  Usually I can predict what will happen, but this one had me guessing.

The editing is a bit choppy since some of the story is told only in flashback, but those moments are very short so you never really get a true sense of the past.  Yeah, I get a brief glimpse of how The Woman in Black came to be, but it wasn’t enough to sate me.  And while The Woman isn’t actually shown much, she is a huge influence on the entire film so she creates this wonderful sense of menace throughout.  When she does show up, it’s creepy and disturbing and oh so delightfully scary.  I cannot express enough how happy I am to have watched a movie that genuinely proved to be a horror.

            Daniel Radcliffe is the main star and while every time I saw him, I did think about Harry Potter, he does prove that he can and will go on to better films.  Not to say the Harry Potter films were bad, but this was a new type of role for him.  He was superb in his first role outside of the series.  Having seen him now, I think he could play a wide variety of characters, ranging from the boy wizard to a man in a haunted house to almost anything.  I have to admit, it was so weird seeing his character in the film drink alcohol.  To me, it was like watching an underage wizard sneaking whiskey.  I just have to remind myself, Radcliff is a man now.  He’s legal.

            Now, having said all that, I still wouldn’t take a young teenager to see this.  I’d say sixteen and up crowd is best suited for this movie.  For the most part, it is tame, but when the action picks up, it picks up quick and it slams into you.  Plus, the movie does feature very violent deaths of children, so it’s not likely that certain people can sit through that.  Look at the opening scene alone.  Three young girls kill themselves by jumping out a window.  Sadly, that is not the most violent death.  

            “The Woman in Black” is a genuinely frightening movie that I wouldn’t recommend seeing alone.  I took Fry with me and we both agreed that this film is worth seeing again.  If the ghosts and death won’t scare you, those creepy looking Victorian toys will.  I seriously could have done without a scene where light reflects off their eyes so it looks like they are following Radcliffe as he walks.  I do admit, this movie isn’t for everyone, but if you’re a fan of Daniel Radcliffe or scary movies like me, you’ll enjoy this one and maybe, get a few good screams out of it.

            Fry and I did agree, this isn’t a movie we wanted to see at night.  They keep using windows as a way to show The Woman, so we left the theater slightly paranoid of looking out our windows at home tonight.  For me, the weird girl who’s rarely scared, I enjoyed being scared.  I liked that this movie had me terrified when the lights went out or that I held my breath every time the eerie music started.

            This is what it means to be a horror movie.  You keep piling on the suspense, keep the watcher hooked and BAM!  Major surprise that no one saw coming leading to an unsettling, fairly open ending.  And normally, I hate open endings, but this one did give me that feeling of satisfaction so I was not upset with the ambiguous end.  Though…it is really sad.  The suspense was nearly killing me until a certain point and I realized what had happened.  

            Absolutely brilliant.

            I want to see this movie again, then own it on DVD.

            Yeah, it was that good.

            I’m TheCinemaChick and this is my only review for the month.  I do however, have some opinion pieces in the works, so keep your eyes open for those.

            Also, I’m about to reach 100 posts.  We might have to celebrate.

Silly demons

            Hey everyone, they call me TheCinemaChick.  I don’t know who they are but that’s what they call me.  I know I’ve been a little quiet for a while but now I’m back and ready to review.  So prepare yourselves for more sarcasm, more insight and a lot more of me going off topic.  As of right now, I’ve got two movies on my plate, but there is a possibility of a third one being added.  Fry and I are currently discussing this.

            I haven’t been super excited about anything in theaters until this week, so of course I jumped at the opportunity.  First on my list of films is Paranormal Activity 3, followed by Johnny English Reborn.  I might be seeing Three Musketeers tomorrow with either Fry or Butterfly, that hasn’t been decided yet.  After that, I don’t think I have anything I really want to see again until October 28.  Sadly, the fall movie season is usually full of duds.  Around Christmas things should pick back up again but for now, don’t expect to have a huge blockbuster come out.  I suppose the exception to this would be the Breaking Dawn movie but I’ve already gone into detail on why I couldn’t care less about that movie.

            Let’s get started with the review, shall we?

            Paranormal Activity 3 is the third in the series of the false documentaries about demonic possession.  Unlike the first two installments, this one is a prequel.  If you haven’t seen any of these films, please stop reading here because I will discuss them, therefore giving away spoilers.  I won’t give away too much about the newest film but since the first ones are out on DVD, I have no problem talking about them.

            The series revolves around two sisters, Katie and Kristi.  In the first movie, Katie slowly succumbs to a demon, eventually killing her boyfriend Micah.  The second movie takes place around the same time, only showing how the demon affected Kristi and her growing family.  At the end of each film, an epilogue is given, stating that Katie (who was the last one to be possessed) has vanished, taking her sister’s firstborn son with her.  Their whereabouts are unknown. 

            While I’m a huge fan of horror movies, I also respect more technical aspects of the cinema.  All the Paranormal Activity movies don’t disguise the fact that it’s supposed to look homemade.  While I’m sure the budget isn’t minuscule, they still seem to make the effort to keep it realistic.  The first two are told by security cameras and handheld devices.  The new one does use the huge, clunky cameras from the 1980s and it feels like an old home movie.  In fact, everything about this movie captures the era, right down to the bad fashion.

            Now, if you are thinking “Oh, the trailer tells me everything I could need to know about the movie”, you are incredibly wrong.  I’d say majority of what’s in the trailer isn’t even in the film.  The movie alone was great but trust me, the previews gave nothing away.  

            I’d also like to point out that I have a healthy obsession for the horror genre, the paranormal, the occult and other things that scare the hell out of people.  I do believe in demons, ghosts, things of that nature, so with that said, I admit my slight bias.  Because I am a believer in such things, the Paranormal Activity movies are more suited for me.  If you don’t believe in such things, it won’t affect you as much.  However, movies with vampires and curses don’t do anything for me.  The closer to home a movie can hit, the more fear it can create, the scarier it becomes.

            Normally, I can sit through a horror flick and come out laughing but I’ll admit.  I jumped several times during Paranormal Activity 3.  At one point, I actually asked Fry if I could hold her hand because I was so freaked out.  While it does follow the formula of the first two, it adds it own little twists in there.  I cannot give away the ending but trust me, it was amazing.  I’d like to see it again honestly and I might do that in the future, when it hits the dollar theater.  Actually, I’d like to watch the first two over, then see this one again.

            If you’re not a fan of this type of movie or the series, go ahead and skip it.  I am a fan and I would actually like to see a fourth in this series, perhaps taking place between the time frame of the third movie and the first one.  Unlike most series that get stale, this one has managed to keep me interested.  Yes, it does feel like it’s the same movie over and over and over, but each one is a different story.

            I liked it and I do recommend it, but again, it’s not everyone’s cup of coffee, or tea if you prefer.  Some people don’t like being scared, some people hate the fake documentary and some people just find the whole idea repulsive.  Then there’s me.  I’m weird, I’m out there and damnit, I’m perfect the way I am.  Love me, love my obsession with horror and macabre.

            So if you’re a single man who doesn’t mind that…call me.  Let’s talk.

            Well, that’s all I really have to say about this movie without going in to the plot.  There’s so much I could say about it but again, I don’t believe in ruining a movie before someone’s had a chance to see it.  And since this came out today, I can’t be “that critic” who tells everyone what happens.  I’m sorry but I think people just want to know if somethning’s good or not.  If I wanted to know what happened in a movie, I would make the conscience effort to go out and see it.  I’m sorry, but I assumed that of my readers as well.  

            So, if you would like me to cover plot more or maybe say cautionary things about a movie, let me know.  I’m adaptable and I’m here for you.  I don’t do this for my health.  Well, I might be, but I’m not sure.

            I’m TheCinemaChick and I love scary movies.