Hi everyone, it's TheCinemaChick again. Today I'm going to be talking about the modern take on an old classic, Beastly. Sadly, Fry was not feeling so well, so she went home but I was forutenately joined by my friend Butterfly. Butterfly is a year younger than me and he's been my friend since high school. Yes, I did say he. You see, several years ago, he showed up at my house and my mother told me to come downstairs to see the butterfly on the porch. Confused, I did as told, only to hear him saying "butterfly, butterfly". Since then, that's what I call him.
I will admit this flat out before we delve into the plot. I don't like Alex Pettyfer. He doesn't have much of a personality when he acts, he's not attractive and I don't see his appeal. I didn't like him in Twilight for men AKA I Am Number Four.
I haven't seen anything Vanessa Hudgens has been in. She is well known for her role in the High School Musical series. Well, I'm in my late 20s, so those movies are way too young for me. I will admit, I've heard her sing, which wasn't terribly impressive, but I'm not her target audience.
And now the movie, Beastly.
As you've seen by the previews, it's about a boy named Kyle (Pettyfer) who is taught to believe that looks are everything. Congratulations, you managed to pull off a vapid, shallow asshole (pardon my language) who dislikes anyone who is not up to his standards. Alex Pettyfer, stick to this role. We begin by seeing Kyle run for president of the Green Committee, an eco friendly committe in his high school. Almost immediately, we are also introduced to Kendra, played by Mary Kate Olsen. Kyle manages to rouse his fellow peers by proudly announcing "Pretty people just get it better". I'll go into why that pisses me off later.
After the speech, where we also learn that Lindy (Hudgens) is running for treasurer, we see that posters of Kyle have been vandalized. Kendra makes no attempt to hide that she was the one who did it. They have a brief moment, he invites her to a party the next night and they part ways. At this party, Lindy is working, Kyle gives her a white rose and they take a photo together. Right before this, Kyle yelled at his housekeeper Zola for getting the rose when he demanded an orchid. Remember Zola, the Jamaican housekeeper. Well, Kendra shows up, Kyle humiliates her in front of everyone and she curses him. Kendra tells him to "embrace the suck", which was his catchphrase. He becomes ill, stumbling from the building and goes home, only to wake up and find that he is *gasp* ugly. You see his face in the previews, so there's no need to describe it here.
Kyle falls into a huge depression. His father, who is a local news anchor, buys him a house away from everything and pretty much abandons him. Parental abandonment becomes a big part of this movie. Months pass and Kyle can't do anything because he's just so upset about this. Keep in mind he only has a year to make someone fall in love with him. Way to waste time, buddy. As he goes all emo, he begins to stalk Lindy. Seriously. He gets her address and stands outside her apartment building and watches her. Then he follows her, only to find out that her dad is a drug addict. There is an altercation and he offers to take her in to protect her from the drug dealer.
I should also mention that Kyle's father has hired a tutor since Kyle won't go to school. Will, the tutor, is played by Neil Patrick Harris. I will discuss my love of him in a bit. Lindy hates living in the house, missing school and her friends. Kyle tries to buy her love, but it fails. Zola tells him to think about what she likes and not just buy expensive things. Then again, Zola is one of the likable characters. She's an immigrant who had to leave her three children behind because they can't get green cards. Will is blind. This is important to know, so remember this too.
So Kyle, now going by Hunter, falls hard for Lindy and goes to insane lengths to be nice to her. He reveals his face to her and even builds her a greenhouse for roses. She slowly warms up to him and they get closer and closer. They even venture to his lake house where she recieves a call telling her that her father has overdosed. He lets her leave with a very, very, very long letter he's written her, basically confessing his love for her. She tries to call him over and over, but her ignores her. Finally, he braves the world and goes to the school where she is about to leave for a trip to Machu Pichu. She says "I love you" and he returns to his pretty self. Lindy comes out of the school looking for him, only to find that Hunter is really Kyle. They kiss and it ends.
Sounds great, doesn't it?
And now it's time for things I don't like.
I did enjoy the movie a litte. I think the message that beauty isn't purely physical is an important one to convey to everyone, but the movie failed to do so. Yes, Kyle gets his looks back and still gets the girl, but to me that just proves that pretty people really do get everything they want. I mean come on, our main characters are played by young, attractive people. This wouldn't happen if you put a real person in there.
Another thing that annoyed me, even though it was small is a chronological problem. Kyle has a tattoo on his arm with a rose bush on it. Kendra tells him when the flowers bloom again, his year will be up. At one point, this tattoo becomes a Christmas tree, complete with lights and a star. However, there is no indication that it's the holiday season. In fact, after this scene happens, there is another scene where there is snow on the ground. I don't understand how we are supposed to believe that its Christmas when in the movie they have just passed Halloween. Maybe I'm the only one who noticed that or perhaps it snows only in February where this movie was filmed. I don't know.
What did I love about this movie?
Mary Kate Olsen as Kendra the witch. She has the right costume and attitude for the part. True, she doesn't show emotions, but that's the character. Everything about her said "I'm too cool for you and you're going to suffer because of what you did to me". However, she does have compassion. At one point, Kyle runs to her and begs for more time. She says he has one year, no exceptions because he still only thinks of himself. Kyle then admits that he thinks about a woman who can't see her children and a man who has no sight. He asks that Zola's children get their green cards and that Will get his sight back. Kendra agrees to grant that if he is successful
Neil Patrick Harris. He is a quirky man. I'm a fan of him already and this helped me like him even more. The character of Will has accepted that he's blind and still leads a happy life. He makes several jokes about being blind because he knows it irks Kyle. Like, there is a scene where Will is selecting a tie and chooses one purely by the feel of the material. He knows Kyle is watching him so he says "Blindy's got still got a sense of style." Later, when he tries to teach poetry to Kyle and Lindy, he is trying to get to the green house, which I forgot to mention is on the roof. You hear him calling up the stairs "Blind guy coming up the stairs. Blind guy tripping." He is hilarious.
I would even go so far as saying that Will is a good representation of the blind community. I do have a dear friend who is blind and I think she would appreciate this character.
What made me truly happy is that Kendra sticks to her promise. After Kyle gets the girl and his looks, we see a blurry image of a card that becomes sharper in a matter of seconds. Then we see Will saying he needs to wake up and stop dreaming. Zola is holding more cards, green cards for her family. I was overjoyed that Kyle did something so kind for the two people that stuck with him throughout this entire ordeal.
My final comment is the ending. We finally get to see Kyle's dad again with some random assitant. She mentions the new intern, who can "work magic" Kyle's dad doesn't care, so long as she is easy on the eyes. The elevator opens and all you see is a pair or black platforms stepping out. The audiences knows that it's Kendra.
So, based on my recently made up rating system, what do I think?
Despite all the things I didn't like about it, I would say to go see this if you can swing a matinée. Even though it has it's problems and the message doesn't quite get across, it's still a good show.
Go see it for Vanessa Hudgens and Neil Patrick Harris.
Butterfly enjoyed the movie as well and didn't have much to add. We're already planning on seeing Sucker Punch next week. And just to toss this out there, Butterfly is just a friend. We're not dating or anything.
So, there you go, Sucker Punch is on my list, possibly Battle: Los Angeles, Limitless and The Lincoln Lawyer as well. I was surprised to hear that The Lincoln Lawyer was selling out at my theater. People were lining up to see it. If it's that good, I should see it, but I will wait another week to do so, so the theater won't be crowded.
Well, I'm TheCinemaChick and on behalf of Butterfly, Fry and Kit Kat, I bid you happy movie watching.
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