Hello all you lovely people on the internet! I’m TheCinemaChick and this is the beginning of a wonderful new project. Kit Kat and I are anticipating the release of Breaking Dawn by looking back at the three previous movies in the Twilight Saga. As I have stated, I’m not a fan of the series, but I’ve read the books and seen all the films to date. Kit Kat is more a fan than I am and Fry…well, we’ll get back to that if she ever gets back to me. So here we go: “Twilight: The Good, The Bad and the WTF moments.”
Hey this is Kit Kat and it's very true. The Twilight series has been something I followed for the longest time. However, I was a late bloomer. I didn't even know there was a book series till I mentioned seeing the preview for a movie coming out called Twilight. A friend told me about the books and I was hooked on the books and couldn't wait to see what the movies were like.
As for me, Fry introduced me to the books. I read them, nothing really jumped out at me and hooked me, but I took into consideration that it was her first novel. With that in mind, I continued to read the series thinking it would improve as it went.
Sadly, it didn’t, but we’re not focusing on why I hate this series. I’m trying to keep an open mine with this one. Trust me, trying to find a bright side to Twilight is quite a challenge for me.
Yes, I know what a struggle this is for you CinemaChick and I'll help you get through it. What are friends for after all. Best plow on ahead to the first topic of this project, dontcha think? The sooner we get going the sooner it's over.
…They sparkle! They freaking sparkle! No vampire does that ever, it’s not natural…not that being a vampire is natural…it breaks my brain!
Calm yourself sweetie. Well,looks like I'll take this to the next step. The choice of actors for the characters featured in the first book called Twilight. Now, I'll have to admit that even though I'd never heard of a majority of these actors before, visually the actors are spot on match for what I wanted the characters to look like were I to ever see them in real life. Some of the acting could have used a little more work. However, some acting couldn't be helped because of the direction being given...on the other hand, some of the acting was just plain bad. You know who I'm talking about, don't you CinemaChick?
Are we talking about Kristen Stewart’s inability to show emotion, other than confused and possibly constipated? For the love of Benji, she’s a teenager and all teen girls are emotional, especially when it comes to boys. At least she matches Bella Swan perfectly: boring, emotionless, disconnected from reality…yeah, she’s a real winner. I can see why all the boys are clamoring over her. I have more personality in my left arm than she does. Not to mention, she’s freaking creepy, going all obsessive over Edward Cullen after one little glance in the cafeteria. Or do they bond over biology and cells?
Yes, yes, you hit the nail on the head. Bella Swan played by Kristen Stewart. Now, I'll admit that I had seen her "acting" in other roles and gave her a pass on some of them because there were moments that were ok enough to be passable. However, she has played the disassociated and outcast girl how many times now? By now she should be well enough versed on that type of role to manage a few extra facial expressions.
How about the fact that she can’t keep her mouth shut? That every scene she in has her gaping at something or someone like a complete idiot? And what’s up with her weird twitching? Does she have a stutter? Is she having a mild seizure? I don’t understand who she is at all. In fact, she is so uninteresting and off putting that I cannot even begin to understand her appeal. What makes all those boys fall in love with her? Damn near everyone is falling over themselves to be her friend. NO ONE WANTS TO FRIEND THE NEW GIRL IN REAL LIFE! It’s almost as if Stephanie Meyer wrote Bella Swan as this perfect, angelic girl with no flaws. In fact, Stephanie Meyer has gone on record saying she based Bella Swan off herself. I call narcissism!
True enough, let's move on to another character. Let's start at the head of the family. Doctor Carlisle Cullen. Now, he doesn't really get much face time in this movie. However, what I did see of him was promising. At least he had normal facial expressions and relaxed acting.
Carlisle Cullen is the paternal figure in the Cullen clan. He’s played by Peter Facinelli, who I think did a great job. The role of concerned parent can be hard, but he pulls it off. Granted, I don’t think the wig and makeup are right for him because he looks washed out. So, physically, I’m not impressed but in terms of someone managing to embody their character perfectly, I’d say he got it right.
Well, the majority of the Cullen's looked washed out but apparently that's a vampire to them. In any case, Peter Facinelli did a very good job playing the father figure. Now onto his partner and wide, Esme Cullen played by Elizabeth Reaser.
Esme does not get enough screen time. She is such a minor role in the movies that it’s almost difficult to judge her character. Esme is the maternal one, accepting Bella into the family immediately, not question Edward’s choice in the slightest. She’s pretty much the perfect mother figure, but like I said, she’s stuck in the background.
I would also have loved to see more of Esme. To really get to know her as a character. But Cinema Chick is right, she's just in the background to play a mom. We never really even get her thoughts on anything in the first movie. Really sad actually.
Hmm...who to do next. Ah, how about one of your faves CinemaChick?
You mean Emmet Cullen?
Yes, him. I know you liked him first and then bounced between him and Jacob Black.
*gets all giddy and giggly* Yes, yes, I do love Emmet Cullen. He’s crass at times, cocky and just so freaking cute. As much as I dislike the series, Kellan Lutz more than makes up for it. He’s great eye candy and he captured the playful essence of who Emmet’s supposed to be. Emmet is like an immortal kid. He likes to have fun, he likes to rough house but he’s still serious and caring when he needs to be. What more do you want in a man?
Yes, I like the way that Kellan Lutz brought Emmett Cullen to life. Granted, there wasn't much to work with in the book itself but Kellan showed that it doesn't matter. His personality and fun in every scene works beautifully.
Did I mention he’s gorgeous and funny? *sigh*
Oh boy, do you need some alone time or are you ok to keep going? Hehe
Moving on to Jasper…let’s just cover the Cullen boys before going on to the Cullen woman.
And now we hit my high point
I have to admit, even I, the critic with a heart of ice, love Jasper Hale. He’s awkward, unsteady and possibly a threat to humans. He has the face of a sweet “good ole boy” with the potential to kill you. Jasper Hale is sexy and deadly. I know he doesn’t have much of a presence in this film, but trust me, he gets his moment in Eclipse. While I do find him cute, I also know that Kit Kat has called dibs on him. Just like she knows Jacob Black is off limits to her. We’ll get to the werewolves later. For now, vampires.
Well, time to get to the last Cullen boy. Edward. The second part of the love triangle. He is played by Robert Pattinson. Now for those of you that don't know who this is next time you watch Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire take a peek at who is playing Cedric Diggory. That's right, Robert has gone from being a wizard to being a vampire in an awkward (and creepy) love triangle.
Oh dear…I told Kit Kat I’d be nice…but I don’t like Edward. First of all, he’s just whiny. He acts like he’s the most emo, emotional person in the world and has so many issues. Honestly, go see a therapist if your desire to kill is that high. And he’s also apathetic. It’s almost impossible for him to be happy. Let’s not forget that he’s a STALKER! He sneaks into her room at night while she sleeps! I could go on and on about why the Edward and Bella thing should be classified as abusive, but I’m trying so hard to be good…
Thanks for holding the majority in there CinemaChick but you're right. I'm voting with you on this one. Edward's motivation towards Bella is just so akward that it makes any real life relationship look like martial bliss. As I said, VISUALLY Robert Pattinson fits the bill of Edward Cullen. But the process of taking Edward Cullen from the book where he was ok to the movies did not translate well.
Before we go on to another topic, should we discuss the villains? They aren’t Cullens, but they are vampires and since they play such a huge role in the first three movies, it only seems appropriate to mention them here as well.
Sure, let's get all the guys out of the way and work our way back through the girls and then on to the werewolves and humans.
In any case, I personally would love to begin with Cam Gigandet as the nomad vampire James. That boy is one hot evil vampire. And not just because he spends his first appearance on the movie shirtless.
Oh yes…he is a very, very good looking man. James is a ruthless tracker who wants to kill Bella mostly to piss off Edward. I’m most likely wrong, but that’s pretty much the impression I got from the movie. He’s portrayed as a psychotic, angry vampire hell-bent on his goal. When Bella runs, it becomes a game to him. While he is the bad guy, he clearly has a lot of fun with being evil. If you don’t believe me, look at the ballet studio scene. James is taunting her, goading her into doing what he wants and has no remorse.
I completely agree. James loves being the vision of a vampire he has in his mind. He is the vampire for everyone who doesn't like the whole idea of the docile Cullens. He enjoys being an animal and views the human race as simply food. Cam was a wonderful fit for this role.
Brief explanation: The Cullens are “vegetarians”, meaning they don’t drink the blood of humans. They only feed off animals. James and his posse are clearly carnivores. They kill humans without care. Shall we finish off with Laurent?
Sure thing. Laurent is played by Edi Gathegi. He is a vampire who is pretending to be the leader of the nomad group that James is a part of while it is actually James who is the head of the group. Laurent always had this air about him that he was bored with James' actions from the start but goes along with it because that's what he knows. To me, Edi's acting as Laurent was one the closest anyone got to be completely true to their character.
I agree. Edi played a seemingly good guy, but even when he talked, the audience could tell he wasn’t being sincere. He managed a decent representation of the character. It’s just a shame he, along with James, had to die so soon into the series. And now, we move on to the females!
I think we need to move onto another hot topic to get the last of those out of the way...at least for the vampires. And I'm talking about Rachelle Lefevre as Victoria Victoria
I won’t say that Bryce Dallas Howard was bad as Victoria Victoria
Well, next let's head back through the Cullen family to discuss me favorite female in this movie. I speak of none other than Alice Cullen. Alice
And honestly, who doesn’t love Alice Alice Alice
She may be my least favorite vampire sometimes but she still has her moments. Nikki Reed had a similar task as Kristen Stewart. Nikki Reed had to play a vampire that didn't like her lot in life and wanted to change it anyway she could. She even hated Bella because she had the life that she wanted. To be able to have a family. In that aspect, Nikki Reed was a success. She played the vicious but beautiful blonde who really is more misunderstood than people realize.
As an actress, Nikki Reed has done very well. She has actually written a screenplay which was adapted into a film. While her emotional range isn’t huge, I’m ok with it. She’s limited pretty much to jealous and anger, which she pulled off really well. I prefer her as a brunette, but she can pull off the blonde wig without it looking horrible. The only thing I hate about her? Obvious! She gets to play Kellan Lutz’s wife AND she’s a great writer. So, go check out Thirteen if you ever get the chance and marvel at how good Nikki Reed is.
Looks like we are all done with the main vampires of Twilight time to move on to the next group that comes into play in a large way. The werewolves. Leading the charge is Jacob Black played by Taylor Lautner. Now, here is the final side of that weird love triangle I mentioned. Taylor Taylor
I do love Taylor Lautner. He’s a great actor and I do see him having a long career in the future. His character isn’t fleshed out in Twilight but he plays a major role in New Moon, which by the way, I only saw because of the half naked, hot werewolves. I was no disappointed. However, there are a bunch of wolves to talk about and it’s now past 1 AM, so Kit Kat, do you want to just bring up the other ones during our discussion of New Moon instead of making this longer than it needs to be?
That works just fine for me since they play a much larger role in New Moon than anywhere else save for Eclipse. So, shall we skip on the last component of the humans?
I’m not happy with how the humans are portrayed. They’re an afterthought. It’s like the director said “Oh yeah, Bella’s not a vampire yet…uh…you five, act like her friend so we can make this high school look realistic.” They’re in the movie less than Carlisle or Esme. Not to mention, they all fawn over Bella even when she basically ignores them and blows them off constantly to do stupid things. I feel sorry for them because they are neglected but still stick around like she gives a damn about them.
Yeah, I feel bad for the humans. I mean come on. Bella is a human first. And if it was really that easy to make friends as a new kid in town then I'd be a popular girl too. Nothing is realistic about the scenarios they throw together for the humans to do together. I don't even think there is a need for us to mention them individually really.
Exactly. It’s so sad that these characters are condensed into the lump category of “human”. They didn’t exactly play a huge role in the books either but still, give them some decency. I can’t even tell you who’s who because they’re only briefly mentioned. I’m sorry meaningless humans. You have no value to Bella because she’s clearly better than you. I’ll rip into her stupidity during New Moon. Anything else to add Kit Kat?
Nope, that's pretty much it for now. I reserve the rest of my scathing comments for various aspects of the movies themselves.
And seeing how it’s 1:30 AM, I’m ready to call this quits. Nothing more can be said until we touch on the individual movies. I’m TheCinemaChick and I would much rather be Team Emmet over Team Edward any day of the week.
And I'm Kit Kat and it's time to go off and make my own Team Jasper shirt.
On behalf of my movie watching crew, I bid you a pleasant movie watching experience.
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